Steppps – Friedenspilgern

On the way

There are no hotels on the whole way. The reason maid be, even though the nature is so beautiful, that the people from the plain area, who would be the creators of such places, are not allowed by law to buy land from the mountain tribes. But here and there a nice simple but cosy hotel – the people would all benefit. On the other hand, nature stayed here so beautifully.

One time I stayed in a somehow lodge in Nungba, half way, for a couple if days. And I had to stay, because through some heavy rain nearly all my close where completely wet. No way, that they could dry during one night in this season. The room I got was without any window, no connection to nature, and done by corrugated iron, totally uncosy. And the owners were forced to kick me, a foreigner, out again, because of some ‚talking‘ in the village. It was uncomfortable, to stay there, but I had no other choise.

All the other days, I was hosted by very nice people. Some picked me up from the steeet, others I had to ask, once at a police station with a remarkable view, once at a school, about 5 times in a series at some churches.
Especially the series at the church places have been amazing. I allowed them, to cook for me, even in the evening, because the Christians here eat a bit earlier, then most Indians. And to my surprise, they cooked the most delicious, just steamed vegetables I have eaten for a long time. Including some bamboo spouds, banana flowers, pumpkin, local beans, potatoes and so on. Thank you all so much. I little overeat myself a bit…. but still a joy and sooo tasty.
But after some days of eating in the evening I am happy to come back to the benefits of not eating at evening/night.

Manipur is again a very Christian state, but most Christians life in the mountains. In the plains, I hear, more Hindu’s but also some Moslems.

The plains have the capital and around a lot of mostly, rice, farming.
The mountains are so gorgeous, full tropical forests.
Most people belong to some tripes, and it seems, most of them want, that Manipur comes independent from India again. They dont feel treated well. Even some underground groups are existing, mostly being up in the mountains…. and some forces army vehicles are always driving fully weaponed. Some days ago, I heard, there was a shooting going around between these two groups…..

Manipur is the first state, where I saw signs for using only toilets everywhere, otherwise fees of 1000 or 500 Rupies are supposed to come. Villagers and government build everywhere public toilets.

The ‚highway‘ is more a smaller road, mostly nice paved, but at some places a mud adventure experience for all the vehicles, motorcycles and me as a walker. At one place I was surprised, that the vehicles can manage at all, to get through that 20 to 40cm of mud? The highway route goes up to Nungba and usually continues on a north route as the official highway, but a bridge had totally collapsed, so everyone has to take the shorter south route, which I anyway had chosen.

Woods and Earth

Manipur is the last state in India. Now I have crossed about 200km, another 100km to come.

I am staying now at a camp ground called ‚Woods and Earth‘ in the ‚Imphal plains‘ (about 800m high) at the foothills of the mountains and have a rest.
Arriving here I was a bit overwhelmed, that universe wants me to have a rest, making decisions, where to put the given tent, accepting the fee rules etc. But I was in need of a rest. To underline the importance of staying a bit longer at this place, I suffered the first night a lot, by getting a cold and at the second night, having water running out of my nose intensely.
Now its already the 5th day at the camp.

The feeling is coming up, to complete the walk in India, the last 100km until the border, but also a ‚inpatient‘ sence, that maybe staying a bit longer for rest maid be good…..

I am a bit worried, how to get the Myanmar Visa, so a thought comes to my mind ‚maybe waiting for the Visa effort until 1st of December?‘

…..
….
…..

While writing I remember to be grateful for any sensations in my body

Thank you
Thank you
Thank you

???????????
?‍♂️????????

Guilt

There is a feeling of guilt in my system, that I feel not any loss, when my father left his body. It seems, that society wants, that I feel a loss, when a friend or a relative leaves.
But how can I feel loss, when I am so happy, that he could manage to complete his life. I am so happy for him and I am so happy in myself.
Sure, I will miss him here and there, I guess, but I don’t feel a loss.
I guess, happiness and loss can’t play together.
In the moment, happiness governs me.

Dad died at 8.20am 26.10.2020

I have a day of rest. At midday Indian time, my father has finally managed to leave his body, passing the gate of transmission.
Ulrich, my brother, informs me by phone. I say ‚I am not going to play a game of being shocked and sad, because we have to behave like that, when someone passes away. I am just happy, and really, it was more then time, that he had to do the step….‘

And I am so happy, that he could manage, to pass…
It is a release for everyone….. it is, to make his life complete, he has to do that step…. then we all can see from another perspective, the whole life, the art work of all his life, has now a beginning and an end…. and the end has to be celebrated to, and I want to celebrate with happiness, because I feel happiness…. and because, it is happiness… its just a transition …. and its a successfully transition which took place.
I salute to him and his completion of his life, which was all together a good life….

And when we look deep, sadness is not there because its a sad act, its because, we ourself, have a problem with letting go…. we are sad, because we have to say goodbye, stay behind…
We are looking back at the past, holding on to it, with its beautiful moment, which cant be replicated (with him).
But we should look back with gratefulness, what we all experienced together, some good, some not so good things.

In gratefulness
In love
In gratitude

Thank you
Thank you
Thank you

I am so happy for you, dad!!!
With love
And there is peace now
Thomas

———-
This I wrote to my family (sorry, only in German)

Ihr Lieben Alle in der Schmöckel Gruppe,

heute morgen hat sich Bernhard ge-löst. Gelöst von seinem Körper nach langer Arbeit in seinem Inneren. 5 Jahre Schmerz, Leiden und nach Aussen hin Vergessen. 5 Jahre gebunden sein im seinem Körper, so dass er sich nun, nach der Lösung, erst mal wieder an mehr Weite gewöhnen muss. Auf der ‚anderen Seite‘ auf das Himmlische trifft.

Liebe Familie,
Wie ihr wisst, bin ich zZt weiter in Indien unterwegs, kann euch somit nicht vor Ort unterstützen, aber ihr könnt euch gewiss sein, dass ich in dieser Zeit auch bei euch bin und euch, mit was auch immer, durch diese Zeit mittrage.

Etliches ist nun zu organisieren, auf die Reihe zu bringen, vorzubereiten, nachzubereiten….. ich denke an euch.

Bernhard hatte ein bewegtes, nach dem 2. Weltkrieg, zwischenzeitlich dramatisches Leben. Zusammen mit Inge folgte dann ein überwiegend erfülltes Leben. Er hat es genossen, Familie um sich zu haben und für sie zu sorgen. Erst die Kinder, dann später die Partner und darauffolgend Enkel und Urenkel, das hat ihm große Freude gemacht mit allen zu sein und die Familie wachsen zu sehen. Es gibt viele schöne Erinnerungen.

Jetzt seid ihr alle dran, Abschied zu nehmen. Jede, jeder hat dabei eigene Empfindungen, Erinnerungen und Abschiedsgedanken. Ich wünsche euch, dass ihr euch gegenseitig zuhört, mitteilt und in die Arme nehmt. Das Vergangene rückblickend anschauend, diese speziellen Momente der Gegenwart teilt und frohen Herzens auch in die Zukunft blicken könnt.

Persönlich empfinde ich Freude und Leichtigkeit und Erleichterung in meinem Herzen. Ich freue mich, dass mein Vater es geschafft hat, durch das Tor zu gehen. Und ich sehe auf sein Leben, und kann von Geburt bis zum Tod sein Leben ehren. Für einige Abschnitte hab ich keine Bilder, aber für viele. Jetzt ist das Leben komplett, von Beginn bis zum Ende. Ein fast 85jähriges Kunstwerk.

Vielleicht habt ihr Lust, hier auf WhatsApp, schöne Erinnerungen und Gedanken, Fotos zu teilen, vielleicht in dieser Gruppe oder per Direktnachrichten, untereinander oder mit mir…

Jeder Lebensabschnitt ist gesegnet.
Amen
????????

Inter State border …..

At the state border from Assam to Manipur, because of Corona, so many regulations. They need a new Covid19 test. So I am sent by so many officials back to Assam and I end up in a very small village hospital, which is actually more or less a maternity ward. One woman is clearly in labour (At the door ‚labor‘) and delivers just then a baby. 2 other ladies are in ‚the process’….
Its Sunday and no Covid19 test centre open here. They want to sent me away ‚come back on Monday 11am‘, but on Assam side, there is no hotel, only having an invitation at the Manipur side. There I cant go, because no test….
I decide just to sit there a bit longer until a solution arises. A responsible nurse makes some phonecalls, organises a Covid19 test, result negative.
Back to the ‚border‘, papers papers papers…. I have not seen a foreigner in month…. so the foreigner office has something to do.
My host had his phone off, later I learn, his battery died while having a puja at the Durga festivals, then it was already dark and I booked a hotel….
Two times more the foreign police officer had more questions, coming to my room….
All together Indian police is always friendly to foreigners….
They had also concerns, that I should not go through Manipur, because Myanmar border is sealed right now (because of Corona)
But walking step by step means also to me, walking to the border of Myanmar is right now right, to see what situation is there in one month…. and not to be worried….
……

As far as I know, this is the only border I could cross by walking coming from India….

The Superintendent of the police has to be informed…..

Missionar

People on the road are present and overwhelmingly talkative towards me. Interested and questioning my appearance. It feels a bit, leaving the country soon, and a collective awareness is greeting. These all happens more and more, since I had this Corona shift/switch inside, a few weeks ago. And it seems to intensify. True is, I leave the state of Assam soon, but will enter Manipur, last state in India…

In Lakhipur a car stops. A journalist and a ‚peace walk helper‘ inside. Short story upload for the journalist. Then the helper organises a place to stay for the last night in Assam. Its a Christian youth center, right before a huge forest area appears. I have to walk another 4km. Chawnga recieves me on the way and we walk the last km together. But the key for my room is not to find. The pastor gets informed and they break the door open. With a spoken prayer by touching my shoulder I am sent on the way next morning.

People coming and coming, where are you from?, where do you go?, why do you do that?, can I help?, are you ok?, do you like some water?, cookies?, you are hungry?…..

‚I am a missionare‘, one man is coming…. The area from here on is again Christian dominated. Missionaries alway think, they have the ‚only‘ truth, everyone has to be convinced by Jesus Christ, only salvation, and surely people have to be converted. He acts like ‚I am the boss here, I now the truth’…. Without letting me explain, who I am, what I do, he seats me down in a shacky restaurant, served with 2 puri’s, somehow he has my phone, gets to youtube, subcribes me to his channel ‚….to heaven‘ and likes his video. Everything without asking me, if I wish so. I am just another one to convert… or whatever victim…. who needs salvation…. I heard about this Christian missionares way of agressive convertion before… And then he asks me suggestive questions to get intangled in the way, he would like the conversation to be, without having a fair and open basic talk….
I confront him, with his behaviour, still in his friendly personality, but in fact on a deeper level, very agressive, overwhelming action, ‚I know everything better, you know nothing, I have the truth, you need to know the truth-behaviour’…..
He has to stop talking like this to me, knowing even not the basics of my spiritual path….
A lot of relegions are so sad, when you are not the member of that religion. This is happening especially by Christians, when you dont answer in the first sentence, that you are also a Christian (implements, that you have not found the truth and Jesus Christ, who is the ONLY one, because he is the son of God, who can bring you peace)
Same happens with Moslems, when they find out, that you are not a Muslim, because ONLY by the teaching of the Quran you can bring you peace and love.
‚So you must be lost and need to be safed….‘
And then, when you tell them, that you are on paper a Christian, Moslem and Buddhist, and to the same time you are not a member of any religious organisation, then the confusion is perfect – and you can’t have found the truth…..
Anyway, he apologized…..
If you have found truth, love, peace, happiness, then there is no need to convert people. Because a human, who carries this wisdom inside, attracts automatically people, who search….

Barefoot in the rain

Again its beautiful to walk partly in the rain barefoot. Its always a healing, when my feet touch Mother Earth.
Even though I am taught from inside, to walk all the time barefoot, in daily practice I am not always, because of different circumstances, able to do so.
But when I have the chance, its soooo good. Especially the rain, makes everything so soft. Sharp little stones on the road feel more round and soft.
And every step on the ground, on Mother Earth, is a blessing for me and the peace walk, I am doing, on behalf.

Thank you
Thank you
Thank you

At the evening I arrive in Hmarkhawlien. In this village, there is a huge Islamic center with a capacity for 1000 people. I am honoured to get hosted there. Through Corona, in this centre are only 20-30 people here, I discover through the evening prayer.
What I enjoy most, is the space, the inner space, which is invisibly present here.
And great hospitality.

My father before transition

Just when I wanted to leave, early morning, I recieve a message from my brother Ulrich, that my father is on the way to die. My other brother Olaf, lives 400km away, and my sister Conny, who lives normally closed by, and did holiday in Denmark, travelled together, to sit by his bed for the last days and hours.

So I decide to stay another day in my room. My father Bernhard is in such a long process of illness – dementia – now, its really time to go.
I meditate for some hours and to be with him and my family, and I really feel, he has to go now and somehow kick him energetically ‚Its really time to go now, please make the step‘
And I am happy, that the process of leaving, the process, of going through that gate to an other dimention, the process of leaving the body for transition is invited, that the time has come….

5 years, since the dementia started, from little forgetfulness towards total being in himself, loosing the ability to speak, and eat for himself, until just sitting in a wheelchair or lying in the bed.

I am really happy, that this time of transition has arrived.

Thank you
Thank you
Thank you

I write to my Conny and Ulrich this massage (sorry, only on German):
Heute morgen, wie schon öfter, hab ich mich mit Papas aktuellem Weg beschäftigt.
Erst mal kam ein Schuldgefühl, nicht gegenüber Papa, dass ich nicht da war/bin, sondern gegenüber euch, Conny und Ulrich. Ihr habt schon soviel tolles und aufopferndes geleistet, und ich bin nicht da, jetzt, um euch zu unterstützen. An dieser Stelle mal ein Allerherzlichstes Dankeschön an dich, Conny und Ulrich im Zentrum, und drumherum Eure Familien und Olaf….

Schließlich verging das Gefühl.
Und es blieb zwar Prozess über, (Prozess des jetzigen Weges) aber alles war überstrahlt von Freude und tiefer Dankbarkeit.
Tiefe Dankbarkeit, was ich alles Papa zu verdanken habe, was er alles für mich und unsere Familie gemacht hat.
Und Freude, Freude, das der Übergang eingeläutet ist. Und für den Übergang kann ich ihn auch von hier unterstützen.

In Liebe für Euch vor Ort
Thomas