Guilt There is a feeling of guilt in my system, that I feel not any loss, when my father left his body. It seems, that society wants, that I feel a loss, when a friend or a relative leaves. But how can I feel loss, when I am so happy, that he could manage to […]

Letter to Bernhards Grandchildren

Letter for all the grandchildren of my father Bernhard, die 26.10.20. Sorry only in German An Jana, Florian, Lena, Nele, Nils, Nora, Finja, Jonas, Emily, Faton und Roy. Ihr Lieben EnkelInnen von Bernhard mit euren Partnern, Familien und ja, eigentlich auch an alle Anderen im ‚Schmöckel Verbund‘ Ich bekomme zu hören ‚Herzliches Beileid‘ oder ‚I […]

Dad died 26.10.2020 8.20am

Dad died at 8.20am 26.10.2020 I have a day of rest. At midday Indian time, my father has finally managed to leave his body, passing the gate of transmission. Ulrich, my brother, informs me by phone. I say ‚I am not going to play a game of being shocked and sad, because we have to […]

Inter State border

Inter State border ….. At the state border from Assam to Manipur, because of Corona, so many regulations. They need a new Covid19 test. So I am sent by so many officials back to Assam and I end up in a very small village hospital, which is actually more or less a maternity ward. One […]


Missionar People on the road are present and overwhelmingly talkative towards me. Interested and questioning my appearance. It feels a bit, leaving the country soon, and a collective awareness is greeting. These all happens more and more, since I had this Corona shift/switch inside, a few weeks ago. And it seems to intensify. True is, […]

Barefoot in the rain

Barefoot in the rain Again its beautiful to walk partly in the rain barefoot. Its always a healing, when my feet touch Mother Earth. Even though I am taught from inside, to walk all the time barefoot, in daily practice I am not always, because of different circumstances, able to do so. But when I […]

My father before transition

My father before transition Just when I wanted to leave, early morning, I recieve a message from my brother Ulrich, that my father is on the way to die. My other brother Olaf, lives 400km away, and my sister Conny, who lives normally closed by, and did holiday in Denmark, travelled together, to sit by […]


Silchar Please people from Silchar. Take care of your city. Stand for your rights, to have a clean city – always. Fight for your rights, to have a good clean-up system, as you partly have. But all the trash needs to be taken care everywhere and all the time, so that you can enjoy your […]

Entering plain south Assam

Entering plain south Assam The Sikh priest is called Granthi and been a truck driver for 34 years. Now he takes care at this temple where nearly only truck drivers are his ‚clients‘. This temple offers beside the religous servises, a washing opportunity and a toilet to the mostly Sikh truck drivers. What a nice […]

Corona switch

I said some day before ‚Something switched in my heart and I am free now (from the Corona craziness)‘ Slowly I understand what this proparbly means. It seems that accommodation issues get normal again. There is coming some normalness into me evening approaches for a place to rest. Since almost 10 days i had no […]