Lumbini and decision making

2 1/2 month in Lumbini lay behind.

I stayed at the beautiful Korean Temple for almost all the time. Exept of a 10 day Vipassana retreat in the second half of May.

It has been a challenging time. The first two weeks I thought it would be just generating time. Then I prolonged another week and another week and another  week and so on.  Only after 6 weeks I felt I am ready to visit the Vipassana retreat. Then … again the same game….

In the first weeks it was 30+ degrees, then 35+, then 40+ degrees. It’s pre monsun. Reguarly the rainy season starts in the end of June/beginning of July in the low lands. There where signs,  that maybe the monsun starts a bit early this year. So after one rain a lot of insect and beatles suddenly appeared, then disappeared again. Another rain soon after, but no insects, at least not so many, they have been the ‚early birds‘. 40+ degrees continued, when inside its only possible with a fan,  otherwise, after 1/2 hour I was wet from top to bottom. When electricity disappeared at night, it was not easy to find sleep. The fan did not do any cooling, just wind. .. but I liked it. I don’t like air conditioner…

My biggest challenges are my inner processes. There is so much going on on the experience level, it’s nearly unbelievable. I am a very trusty person, but some of the experiences are nearly over the edge. I know, that a lot of defilements and sankaras get eradicated, and for that I am happy to do it and meditate a lot,  but it’s partly also painful – luckily I know, what’s going on. It feels, my whole body gets a new structure, but until now it’s not ready yet. Especially my right knee makes pain. I know it’s along the meridian line and it’s a healing process….. and at some times I really don’t know, if my knee is injured…. anyway, my body and system does not want to walk.

I thought of walking from Lumbini to Kathmandu through the Annapurna trek, I am more or less sure, that I could make it, and it feels also sure, that this knee thing is not finished, when I arrive in Kathmandu…. and then the Visa is finished again…. sooo???!!!

Then I thought of staying in Lumbini – meanwhile getting a Indian Visa – taking care of my system change or healing in the south of Nepal and then starting on the end of August to walk to all the Buddha places in India south of Lumbini. I could experience the beginning and ongoing Monsun, meditate a lot, observing all the staff working through me.

Then I thought off flying back to Germany, visiting my mother, relatives and friends, having some rest time from the peace walk, and after a break of some more or less month to come back and walking the rest of the way.

Every day it was a different experience inside of me, what would be the right decision. Every day!!! That’s how I knew, it was not the right time to make a decision.

So I waited patiently for the right moment to come.

I am now 2 years in India and Nepal. Who read my blog, knows, that I have an issue with Indian food, especially the yellow powder spices, onions anyway, and I have an issue with some allergies, mainly gluten -but it got better- here and there I can eat some bread. The white rice sticks to much in my stomach, but I could enjoy brown rice every day in the monastery. All together it take some energy  from me, as you can imagine.

In Lumbini they have a local problem with the water. Investigations brought the result, they have lead in the water. People drink still from the well, very good cleansed water can be bought from different companies, in the monastery, they cook the water to kill bacterias, but the lead is not eliminated by that. After 2 weeks, not knowing about the water facts, I faced a lot of pimples on my whole chest, in some parts I had the suspicion, that I could even have shingles, because of some little blisters. About five weeks after the first pimples I heard about the investigation and immediately started only drinking filtered water. Pimples disappeared. The monastery continue to use the well water for cooking, so in any soup or cooked meals and rice, you know, there will be some lead in the meal. The meals have been, beside of my issues with yellow powder spices and onion, very good, lots of vegetables!!!

Also I sences an old issue on the property of the UNESCO world heritage (and) around. I started working on it, could not finish the process, would like to do it one day with some more people, maybe through sound healing and toning.

I am now 7 years on the road, and I really really miss organic food. Clean organic food. I guess, this would help me a lot to some extent with some of the body issues.

Also I realized, that the chaotic situation on the streets – the somehow street culture -since at least Afghanistan combined with lots of poorness is also taking a lot of energy from me. Since I started the Peace walk towards India and Myanmar, and also before, walking  around Germany and all neighbour countries I generated a lot of tolerance, so relizing this enery succing ‚thing’…. it opened my eyes. And being in India the two years before, walking a lot in the Himalayas, I did not have that issue so much. Walking in the low lands the enery is different, more chaotic, more poor….

Who read my blog from September last year, knows that I thought a lot about my mother, made a decision, to see her in November last year. But some nights later, when I was caught in the unexpected snow fall in the 4500 m high mountains, when the snow stopped falling and the sky opened up, ‚it‘ woke me up.  I opend my tent,  very best beautiful full moon energy, I left the tent about half hour open ( at -10 degrees) and I heard a voice telling me: you can also go to Germany in the summer 2019 -for me it was somehow mid of June. Some days before the 15th of June, in the evening, I knew, I will move soon from Lumbini….. In the beginning it was not clear, what will happen. Little later it cristalized, that I proparbly fly to Germany.

Somehow the feeling did not change anymore, to fly to Germany, for me very suddenly, on the afternoon of 15th of June, I decided spontaneously to take the night bus to Kathmandu. Also it was easy to make the arrangements for flight and around. No-one in Germany know from my plans, so it hopefully will be a happy surprise.

Even the fe‘ not wanting the peace walk being interrupted, disappeared.  So surprising to me.

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