Changes and News

It is Magdalena:)

Do you know this times in life when everything is just in perfect order, because you just know you are at the right place, doing exactly what you want to do? And do you know too, this times when things are changing and you are confused because suddenly nothing is sure anymore and you do not exactly know why and where the next steps will lead you? After amazing, wonderful four month full of great experiences with the pilgrimage I suddenly came in such a situation. First I did not really allow myself all this feelings, of being unsure and having doubts. It seemed there were like two possibilities  at that moment for me – to walk on with Thomas or to go to Corse to meet Paulin and than return to the pilgrimage –  and I had to decide as fast as possible what to do. I changed my mind very often in this days, created some confusions for the others and especially for myself, until I realized something very important at the morning Thomas and me wanted to leave Bukarest. I realized that I did not know what to do, after feeling all this different solutions I made, I still did not feel clear. So I discovered that there was a third opportunity.

If you do not know where to go, stay where you are until you know – give yourself time, admit to be unsure.

Wow, this was a big step for me. Thomas reacted so very kind and compassionate to this decision, what showed me to have done the right thing. But what I had to do was to find myself a place to stay.  After some more confusions, I ended up in the train to Vienna, what felt terribly wrong. I had to admit to myself  that I had made a wrong decision,but

As soon as you see that you made a wrong decision, you can change the situation.

And I got help. The help came by a woman I met in the train, and who offered me – after I told her my story – to come with her to a friends place in Busteni.  I said yes and so my way lead me back to the mountains, the Bucegi mountains, in the Carpats. There I felt right. And it showed up that it were the mountains, Thomas had been to two weeks before and Annelie about one month ago.

It was like finishing something there. I was a lot outside in nature, did some toning sessions and just gave myself time to digest the last month of walking, understanding my doubts better and foucsing  new.

So by now, I still do not know exactly what will happen in long term, it seems like I have to really live out the uncertainty     and taking my time. I am very happy every time I think of Thomas who is on his way

(I GOT AN SMS TODAY THAT HE HAS ARRIVED BY NOW THE BLACK SEA:)

and I feel very connected to him and to all the other people I walked with. One chapter of walking for peace is finished for me here in Romania, I learned so much. I always said I do not know how long I will be with the pilgrimage and now I have to figure out if I will begin a new chapter.